Billionaire Blog Posts

Dark Money Billionaires Celebrate AZ Victory!

Posted on | January 5, 2015 | Comments

Today Billionaires from all over the US flew their private jets into Arizona to celebrate their Dark Money victory at the Arizona Gubernatorial Inauguration. Millions of dollars were sent from out of state Billionaires to ensure the election of Gov Ducey, Attorney General Brnovich and the Corporation Commission, to name a few. Now it’s payback time. So the Dark Money Billionaires were first in line as the newly elected officials began their time in office.

See all Dark Money Billionaire Inauguration pics here!

GOP Pageant in Mesa Attracts Billionaires

Posted on | February 25, 2012 | Comments

Four courageous Billionaires braved the 70 degree weather and the throngs of filthy middle-class folks on Wednesday evening to remind everyone who the GOP contestants truly belong to. The Billionaires paraded around with signs that read “Invest In America: Buy a President”, “We Luv Newt: Take Us to Our Moon Mansions” and “Don’t Tread On My Corporate Tax Loopholes”.

All the while looking fabulous, they filled the air with their informative chants. “We Are the 1%! Vote Romney for President!”, declared David H. Koch-Hoare. And Paree Hiltonian exclaimed, “Hey, hey! Ho, ho…Keep the profits with the CEOs!”

Just before the GOP pageant began, the Billionaires even took some time to roll out their own red carpet and show the crowds just how special they are. A grand time was had by all.

When asked by reporters after the contest was over, who they thought had won, both Dr Dinero and Mo Fracking Monet both put down their martini glasses, held up a hand full of cash and answered “We won. We always win.”

See all pics here.

AZ Billionaires Welcome Romney to AZ for Invite-Only Fundraiser

Posted on | September 15, 2011 | Comments

GOP Candidate Mitt Romney had a fundraiser in Tempe, AZ at Tempe Center for the Arts. It was a beautiful and very…rich atmosphere. We were so thrilled that Mitt had accepted one of our own dogmas as his own:

“Corporations Are People Too!”

You’re our hero, Mitt!

Check out our media coverage here:

Billionaires Welcome Romney

Billionaires Show Support to AZ-CD5 Congressman Schweikert in his only Townhall

Posted on | September 15, 2011 | Comments

The Billionaires showed their for enthusiastic support for Congressman David Schweikert CD-5 in Fountain Hills, AZ. In what was his only Townhall scheduled for his summer break, we didn’t want him to have to face the rabble without our support. We cheered his every reference to Trickle-Down and Job Creationism that he bravely spout out. Whatta guy!

Schweikert Townhall in AZ

Phoenix, AZ: Billionaires Publicly Support local Americans For Prosperity Organizer, Tom Jenney

Posted on | September 19, 2009 | Comments

When the Phoenix Billionaires found out that local AFP organizer, Tom Jenney, was going to Scottsdale again to rally the teapartiers, we decided that his good deeds could no longer go un-rewarded.

Ol’ Tommy played a little hard-to-get at first, but he relunctantly did accept our check made out to “Americans For the Prosperity of Koch Industries“. We can understand his shyness, because before this we’ve been avoiding the public light as to our financing of the front groups. We’re wealthy and proud and we’re not going to take it anymore!